What, How, and for How long?

What can you do when someone you love very much and have known forever starts to feel so distant and different? How can you show them that love when you are starting to realize that this person may not be the same person you've known forever and you don't feel you're able to support them to the extent that they need to be supported? How long do you sit by patiently and wait for them to figure out who they really are and realize what they're doing?

The only answer I can come up with is this: You be there, you love them, and you wait for as long as it takes. If you really do love them that much, you will always love them so how could you not wait? How could you not help?

All you can really do is be patient and try your best to be supportive without being hurt when they don't listen. The other thing you can do is to let go, not of the love, but of the need to help them be more like you. Maybe this person isn't like you, maybe they don't want to be like you. You just love them for who they are and who they want to become.

MOVING!!! Woo Hoo!!!

So last weekend, my family, friends, Ben, and I have been working on moving me to the mother-in-law apartment in my parents' basement. It's just down the stairs for me, but we had lots of furniture to bring in and clear out, not to mention the rearranging of the now vacant bedrooms upstairs. It's been a lot of work but it's been so worth it and I'm so excited about how the apartment is coming together. It does make me miss Ben even more at night though to now have all this space for myself without anyone to share it with. Like Mark Twain said: To derive the greatest joy in life, we must divide it with someone else. It's also been interesting to have a king bed all to myself because I fall asleep on the side where my lamp is and when my alarm goes off in the morning from the other side of the bed, I reach for it and all I can feel is MORE BED! So then I roll over a few times and then I can stretch out and reach the button.

What I love most about moving out is the change in my mom that it has instilled. She is now viewing me as an adult and the idea of me moving out and getting married isn't as scary for her. She can actually see some benefits now (like being able to turn my room into the work out room...) It's been really good for all of us, she lets me do my thing and I'm doing my best to survive on my own (which only works to some extent since they still cover my gas and groceries and I don't even have an oven or microwave downstairs... it's basically been pasta on the stove down there... the oven/microwave is coming, soon, I hope).